Why I've Been M.I.A. Lately

It's been a couple of months since I last sat down to write a blog for the Wu's Feet Links Columns Blog. It's been three months since I last published an interview to the Wu's Feet Links Interviews Blog. I've been popping into the Wu's Feet Links Forum sparingly as well. A few of my posts there have mentioned that I've been dealing with something and that I would with all of you soon. Well, that's what I intend to do today.

This month's blog entry will have nothing to do with feet or foot fetishism. It isn't about anything sexy or teasing. This will be anything but those things. What I need to do is share something with all of you. I debated with myself for weeks whether I should bring this up, but the idea that I could possibly help someone out there was too strong. That's why this column is being written.

I want to come here to say that I'm currently dealing with a family member with a severe addiction to heroin and/or pain killers. Even though I've been out doing my photos and trying to live life, it has been a looming presence over both my and my parents' shoulders. Things have gone from bad, to worse, to rock bottom, to how in the hell is it still going on?

For a few years now we have known that my younger brother has had an addition problem. Things first came to a head when he was arrested for stealing from his job. After going to court a few times he wound up with probation and a restitution payment. For many, that probably would have been enough to say that it's time to clean up and get my life on track. Not the case here.

Time progressed after this to where my brother's girlfriend finally had enough and left him, taking their daughter with her. My brother would only see his daughter if/when he saw her at my parents' house. My parents love spending time with their granddaughter and my brother's now ex-girlfriend said she just didn't want my brother taking her without them around. In his case, I found that totally understandable. Still, this was not enough to straight himself up.

From here things really turned for the worst. My brother just wasn't finding the help he needed and reverting back to his deadly habit. At this point, my parents allowed him to move back home and try to help him in any way that they could. What would ultimately end up happening, however, was a few thousand dollars worth of their property would find their way to pawn shops, or sold to who knows who? A number of items that I owned were also included as share a storage locker with my parents and he got into it and took some of my collectibles and property.

At this point I was infuriated! Time and time again my brother would tell us how things are going great, all the while stealing from right under our noses. My mom was now a wreck and my father was at the point where he wanted him out of the house. I told them they had tried, but I agreed with my father. They had to send him out on his own. Years of support was only enabling him to continue his habits at our expense. My parents had paid to get him help, allowed him to live somewhere to get back on his feet, helped him with his bills, and so much more. The thanks they got were a bunch of things stolen from them. My father was able to find a good number of items in local pawn shops, but that meant buying back our own things. I told my father to file a police report to get them back, but my parents did not want to send him to jail. I think that is where he belonged. Still, all this didn't stop his ways. Not even after they threw him out of the house.

Finally, things looked good, in my eyes, for my parents. They were not going to have to deal with my brother being in their house stealing their property. My parents finally seemed to come to terms with him either doing what he was going to do to himself, or finding help on this own. We were freeing ourselves of this without him in their house. So we thought. 

More things turned up missing. He was allowed to stop by the house to pick up his mail, or see his daughter from time to time, as long as someone was there. Still, he was able to take things out of my parents house. It got to the point where he was no longer welcome to the house at all. This broke my mother's heart, but she knew by continuing to help, she was actually enabling him to keep up doing what he was doing. Still, not something that has been easy for her to handle.

Once again, at this point in time, my brother made a statement that he was going to find help. Sadly, I counted this as another ploy to gain trust, but for the first time my parents told him that he had to be the one to do it. I agreed. Someone in his place will only stop doing what they're doing once they decided it's time. None of us can do it for them. Right now, he is jobless, but was able to check himself into a long term facility that helps people in his situation. I hope this is the time that actually works, but at this point, we're all a little defeated and know it's out of our hands.

The above recount leaves out so many little details and issues of heartbreak and anger. I didn't want to go into any of the details here at the start, but not mentioning them didn't really portray some of the things that my parents and I have been going through with my brother. I tell you these things not to drum up sympathy for us, but to share what we went through. If you're someone who has dealt with such things, you exactly what I'm talking about. I want you to know that you're far from the only person dealing with this horrible ordeal. And if you're the person who is struggling with the habit, or any habit for that matter, know that you have to be the one to help yourself. You're only hurting yourself and your family members. Things can get better, but they sure can get worse too!

I thank all of you for giving me the ability to share this with all of you. If even one person gets comfort, or hopefully finds inspiration to help themselves out, then I will be happy that I made this choice to share my situation.

Your Suggestions/Help Needed

Karolinka is a sweetheart and quite simply, a master at the art of footjobs.

So here I am in year three of writing columns and conduction interviews for the Wu's Feet Links Columns Blog and the Wu's Feet Links Interview Blog. For the first two years things were smooth sailing when it came to coming up with topics or finding people to interview. Then it seems like I hit a wall. This wall is one I feel like I'm still climbing.

As you are aware by the time stamps on both blog sites, sometimes the columns and interviews just don't happen on a monthly basis anymore. At times, this is due to my own busy schedule. Work has been asking more of me and I've also been trying to make some major changes to my own website, Soles of Silk. And sadly, as of late, I've had some unfortunate family issues that I've been dealing with. That being said, I've still managed to contact people in the background about taking part in both the columns and interviews. Things just haven't always turned out as well as I had hoped.

Columns Blog
Coming up with topics for this particular blog site has been one that isn't always easy. I feel like I started out very strong with topics that involved lots of my peers in the foot fetish community. People seemed eager to help and I had a lot of fun writing up those pieces.

As of late, however, I've had trouble contacting people for inclusion in some ideas I have. There are a few on the back burner that I want to get to, but don't want to rush. Karolinka, for example, who you see at the top of this column, has agreed to help me out with a piece I want to do on footjobs. She was the October 2015 Interview and we've talked from time to time about getting together for some future items here on the columns blog. Karolinka was also the March 2017 Feature Model on Wu's Feet Links, so be sure to check that out.

I'm also thinking about talking with Roxie Rae from The Foot Fantasy, about a topic to do with tease and denial (T&D) and jerk off instruction (JOI). She too, has been very helpful in the past. Roxie was the August 2014 Interview on the Interviews Blog. From there, she took part in one of my early columns, "One For the Ages, Part 1: Teens to Twenties" and has never hesitated to help out whenever I've come calling. She has allow me to use her photos to help illustrate any of my columns topics numerous times. She also came through with a bunch of photos for the Wu's Feet Links Feature Model section, when she was featured in June 2016 feature, "Pretty Pool Peds."

That's only two topics, however. What kind of things would you like to read about? I can't promise that I'd be up for any and all topics, but I'm looking for advice here. I still am also up for entertaining the idea of guest columnist, but all the past offers went as far as a, "Hey, I'll do it" offer and then nothing ever came about.

It's inevitable that I will sometimes do topics, like this one, that just talk about the happenings of Wu's Feet Links, these blog sites, or whatever is on my mind. Columns, by nature, aren't meant to be articles, per se. I just like adding in some of those elements whenever I can.

The Footosopher asked me about my interest in interviewing Elettra.

Interviews Blog
This blog is where some of my major issues come from. Back in 2014, I was sending out interviews for the Interviews Blog and getting them returned to me much sooner than I expected. I built up a backlog of interviews that were ready to be published. For months I had the interviews saved to the blog in draft form, waiting for the date they'd go live. Then... people began to flake.

At first, it was just one. Then it became two. At this point in time, I have taken the time to write out close to a dozen interviews that people told me they were up for doing. That's an entire year's worth of interviews! Most of these are foot models, but a couple were also webmasters. I've given up on many of these people getting back to me, but I'm still hopeful on the last two I sent out. Honestly, however, these two models have not answered a single message I've sent them about the interview over the last couple of months, so I probably shouldn't even be hopeful.

I don't expect people to get to the interviews as soon as I send them their way. I tell them to take their time and say what they want to say. It's only when time begins to pass and I don't hear from them anymore that I get annoyed. I'd rather someone just tell me they're not interested, or don't have the time. I won't be insulted and I'll look around elsewhere. It's when I take the time to write up questions and send them off, and then seemingly get ignored - that's when I get pissed. I just don't fire off these questions in 10 minutes. I take time to go onto my interviewee's site(s), buy memberships and/or clips to see their content, and try to gear my questions to the particular person. If the person has no intent of following through, I'd rather focus my efforts (and money) on those who will.

Where this further hinders my efforts is when I have someone coming to me about being interviewed, or has a model who'd like to be. This was the case with a recent conversation between the Feetosopher, the webmaster of Barefoot Nudity and Barefoot Urban Girls. He asked if I'd like to interview two of his models, Swains and Elettra (above). Of course, I was very interested and still am. Sadly, however, I've had barely any time to get either interview worked on, much less completed. With all the personal items going on that I mentioned at the start of this blog, and the time I've had wasted by others, I have fallen behind. I, however, was honest with him about me not being sure when I could get them over to him due to these reasons. I can't be a hypocrite, after all.

The Feetosopher has been one of the people I've come to trust and lean on whenever I need help with anything on Wu's. He helped me get an interview out to Red-X, one of my favorite models of his, in August 2015. Then in March 2016, he, himself, was the focus of an interview. He's also submitted a few photo sets for the features section, including the November 2016 feature with Swains, "Swains, the Classy Barefooter," and the April 2015 feature with Red-X, "The Year-Round Barefooter."

I will work on these interviews for Swains and Elettra and hope he can find time to pass them onto his models. He was hoping for me to have Swains done several weeks ago because he had planned on meeting up with her. Sadly, I was not able to come through due to those reasons above. Still, I fully expect that both ladies will be the focus on future interviews.

Now that I'm done my rant, I want to say that the Interviews Blog gets its fair share of views - some in the tens of thousands. I've had interviewees contact me after their interviews were published to tell me the feedback was great. It's exposed them to potential new fans and customers. Many are glad I asked them to do it. I, of course, thank them for taking their time to help me keep Wu's Feet Links going in whatever capacity I can.

All this being said, if you think you know of anyone that hasn't already been interviewed that you'd like to see, please, by all means, let me know. Keep in mind, however, if you send me a listing of premier adult actresses, it's probably not likely that they're going to do it. Where I've had luck thus far was asking webmasters and foot models who are involved with running their own sites/stores. These foot models who run their own sites/stores see the value an interview could bring, like Roxie Rae, for example.

Where I seem to strike out, sadly, is with foot models who bounce from site to site, model their feet, and move on to another site. I don't want to stereotype every model that does this because that would be unfair. With my experiences, however, these models appear happy with their income and it seems like they feel no need to promote themselves further. So, if you send me a list of names, keep all these things in mind.

Before I close this out, my fellow webmasters and foot models, if you, yourself, or one of your friends in the foot fetish community, would like to be featured as an interview, by all means, please contact me. I'm always looking to make some new friends in the community, so even if we've never talked, reach out to me!

10 BHE Foot Models I Love... From Other Sites

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Confidence Leads to Comfort

Alice's confidence in herself has made her ever so comfortable with the fetish.

"The older I got, and when I got to know you, Patrick, the more comfortable I got with the idea of a fetish in general."

- Alice, Wu's Feet Links Interview (Jan. 2016) 

There I am, nose to toes with Alice's size 11 feet and her well worn flats - the ones she wears to work daily. She doesn't care. Nope. She actually thinks it's rather adorable. And knowing her, she probably wore them a little longer just to moisten them up inside. Oh Alice...

Alice is like many of the females I've become friends with over the years. She doesn't find my fetish to be anything out of the ordinary. She fully believes your kinks should be something you embrace. She even said as much in her January 2016 Interview on the Wu's Feet Links Interviews Blog.

"There is nothing to be ashamed of. We like what we like and everyone likes something different. Take pride in what sexually arouses you! Have fun with it!" she encouraged.

I decided to start this blog off with Alice because of the journey she took to get to where she is now modeling. It would have been so easy for Alice to classify me as a "creepy old guy with a foot fetish," and never entertain the idea. Add in the 18 years separating us and her preconceived notion about the fetish prior to shooting for me and it makes for a great example of the purpose of this blog.

"When I was first introduced to foot fetishism, I thought it was a joke, honestly. I was a little judgmental and thought it was weird," she admitted.

So what made her change her mind? What lead her to eagerly want stick her sweaty feet in my face for the photo above? It was my confidence as it pertains to my fetish and ability to make her feel comfortable because of it. That led to her own confidence to grow and her own feelings to change. Now she realizes the beauty and power her large size 11 feet have over many of us out there.

"The older I got, and when I got to know you, Patrick, the more comfortable I got with the idea of a fetish in general," Alice said.

Alice's ever growing confidence has led to her becoming one of the site's most photographed models within just two short years. It just continues to grow and now she's even asking her friends to shoot.

There was once a time, however, where I didn't exude that confidence in my fetish. It's been an awful long time, but my love for women's feet was something I used to be embarrassed about. You'd have to go back to when I was 18 and dating Abby to find that version of me.

All these years later, I'm so lucky to have Abby still modeling her adorable little feet.

Back in 1997 a skinnier me was getting introduced to perhaps still the softest feet I've ever touched. Abby read me like a book. Even back in high school, before we dated, she knew I liked feet. Once we started dating, she went and made a monster out of me. First, however, she had to open the cage door and make me step out. And it didn't take her long to unlock that door and begin that process either.

The very first day we hung out together, she was sticking McDonald's French fries between her toes and encouraging me to eat them. A much more timid me, was hesitant. I had never experienced such a blatant request and yet, there she was, beckoning me with a confidence of her own that started to make me feel more comfortable. Each and every experience afterward would only make my own confidence grow. Still, however, that was only between the two of us.

A few months later, Abby told me that she told a few of her friends that I had a foot fetish. I honestly remember that conversation in her living room and feeling embarrassed. "How would they look at me now?" I thought.

Abby assured me that her friends thought it was awesome. I was still feeling a little unsure of her decision, but I'd eventually see that she was right. I even got to take foot fetish photos of one of those friends, an Asian girl living next door. When I got them both together in a set, I didn't think it could get any better. The monster was officially born.

In her 2006 Wu's Feet Links Fan Interview, Abby shed some light on her feelings all those years ago. She said, "My ex-boyfriend, Patrick, is who got me into the foot fetish world. That was his thing and I supported it. I told him it was a great thing and not to be shy about it."

Fast forward to present day and I guess you can say the shoe is now on the other foot, pun intended. It's my own confidence that has allowed me to have countless female friends shoot for Soles of Silk. I rarely have to convince anyone. I just ask. The only things that generally holds my female friends back from shooting are their partners not being as comfortable with the idea, or things such as jobs. These girls know what I do and have become comfortable enough with me to want to kick their shoes off and show all of you their feet. And as you can see, even after we broke up back in 1999, Abby still actively models her captivating feet for me. I'm glad we've maintained our friendship and that she still loves being in front of my camera making her feet wrinkle up like no other.

If Mindee could shoot every day, I honestly think she would. She loves it.

I'd be lying if I told you that some models didn't need a little convincing though. Even Mindee, the site's most photographed model, wasn't sure about it back in 2004. Once she became comfortable, however, her confidence also began to grow. Now Mindee has over 4,000 photos and counting with no signs of stopping. Another thing she's quick to take advantage of is my foot massage skills. If I haven't grabbed her feet at some point during our get togethers, she's sure to push the issue. Down time is foot rub time! We're actually meeting today for lunch and a foot rub. This is such a far cry from how things were 13 years ago. In her case, I might have created the monster!

"In the beginning I was terrified. The simple fact is you're my friend and you already made me feel comfortable. The truth now is, I absolutely enjoy it!" Mindee said in her 10 for 10 interview conducted during Soles of Silk 10 Year Anniversary celebration.

As you can see, both Mindee and Alice have had a similar story. They both came from a place of uncertainty and progressed to a place where they can't wait to find some more time in front of the camera, or with their feet being pampered by yours truly. The same holds true for some of the models I wasn't friends with prior, say someone who was a friend of a friend, for example. 

When those first timers show up to a shoot and and see how laid back I am about the site and fetish, they begin to grow more comfortable. I sometimes even crack jokes about the fetish, or even on myself for having it. I don't care. If it helps relieve any tension that girl may have, I'll do it.

"I just might be the only male photographer you'll have that means your toes when I ask you to, 'spread'em," I will often say to a newbie.

I don't think that has never not elicited a laugh. Then I'll usually tell her that I should look into what the other guys are shooting now that I think about it. Again, that's usually followed by more laughs. Those little things go a long way.

With all this said, I won't sit here and tell you that there isn't the rare exception where a woman is just repulsed by the idea of someone into feet. Not everyone has the same opinions, or are as open minded as likes Abby, Alice, or Mindee. These types of people won't change their mind, no matter what you say. There is no need to try to convince them. Surely, there are some models who you might be able to pay enough money to get in front of your camera, but I'm talking more about those who do it because they have fun with it. The ones you have to overpay won't be fun to shoot and I have no interest in them. To each their own, though.

When it comes to personal friendships, if there is ever a person who ceases being your friend, or treats you with disrespect for simply having a foot fetish, they're not worth your time. Move on and find someone less petty. Life is too short to surround yourself with people like that. No real need to elaborate on this any further. Let them screw off.

It is not impossible have a healthy friendship with someone who will never understand your fetish or kinks pertaining to feet though. I currently work with such a girl who turned me down ASAP when I asked her to shoot a couple of years ago. She hates feet and doesn't get the fetish at all. Even when Kaycee and Reagan tried to talk her into shooting, she flat out refused. Kaycee and Reagan have a blast shooting and thought they might be able to talk her into it - girl to girl. But alas, nope. I did appreciate their effort though.

Regardless of her feelings, I can respect that. It doesn't appeal to her and has never affected our friendship. If over time she should begin to have a change of heart, then maybe we'll shoot. For now though, she's just a friend who doesn't get barefoot in front of my camera. You can have those friends.

The one thing that I've come to find troublesome is when you're in a romantic relationship and your partner is the one who can't accept your fetish. For me, I cannot be with someone who doesn't accept my fetish. If that sounds selfish, I make no apologies. My fetish is a part of me and I know there are enough people out there who would appreciate it. And yes, I've been in a relationship with someone who hated the attention I'd tried to give her feet. That person is Paige Noelle, who'd later model for the site.

I was shocked when Paige offered to model for me after we broke up.

Paige and I only dated for several months, but the entire time we did, she protested my desire to give her a foot rub while we'd watch TV, or relax after a long day at work. Knowing that, I knew other kinks concerning her feet were out of the question. We lasted only a few months and broke things off amicably.

With that knowledge, you can imagine my confusion when Paige offered to shoot for Soles of Silk a couple of years after we broke up. She wanted me to take some standard pictures of her and offered to do mine in trade. She admitted that she still didn't get the whole fetish, and didn't find her feet to be as cute as I claimed. She still thought it could be fun nonetheless and I accepted her offer. As strange as it sounds, loved being back around her feet. It was like they were that forbidden fruit. That shoot was easily the most time I spent before her tender feet, before, during, or after our break up. 

When it comes to other people's relationships, I have been contacted by a number of guys over the years who are in a similar situation as I was with Paige. It's hard for me to give them advice because in some of cases, they've hidden their fetish their entire lives. Ever since Abby, all my subsequent girlfriends have known the deal with my fetish. Minus Paige, all of them adored the attention I gave their feet. They'd throw their feet in my lap for a foot rub without my asking, then eventually have journey elsewhere - both north and south. Whether it was for teasing or pleasing purposes, those girls loved the power their feet had over me and made sure to take advantage of it. That's just what loving couples do.

What really upsets me is when I hear some of these guys tell me that not even their own wife or girlfriend know about their fetish, even though they've been together for a long time. I can't even fathom what that would be like. But it gets worse...  Some even think telling their spouse could potentially tear apart their relationship. That's just not good. How do you even respond to that?

I'm no relationship councilor, so the only thing I can tell people in this situation is basically what I've said above. Accept your fetish. Let go of the fear of that others will think less of you. If you display your confidence, and appreciate a woman above her ankles as well (very important), then more times than not, she'll come around to it.

Ultimately, only you know yourself and those who surround you. No matter what you do in life, never feel bad about having your fetish. Accept it, but don't allow it to consume you. It can be a fun part of who you are, if you allow it to be. You might start off like I did and be weary of the path before you, but just know that some of those twists and turns can lead you to some memorable times.